Making Work Friends When You Have a Disability

Positive work relationships can make a real difference in how included, supported, and confident you feel at your job. A friendly chat, a sense of team belonging, or simply having someone to eat lunch with all help work feel more manageable and enjoyable.

But if you have a disability, long-term health condition, or are neurodivergent, connecting with colleagues isn’t always straightforward. You might be navigating extra challenges, such as:

• Physical or sensory environments that make social interaction harder
• Colleagues who may not understand your access needs
• Communication preferences that differ from workplace norms
• Low energy, pain, or anxiety that reduce your social capacity

At YorLinc, we know how real these experiences are. This guide offers practical strategies for building positive workplace relationships at your own pace in a way that supports your wellbeing and respects your boundaries.

You’re Not Alone

Feeling unsure about how to connect with new colleagues is more common than people realise. Many people – with or without a disability – find workplace relationships awkward at first. But if you’re managing extra access needs, you might also be wondering:

• Should I tell people about my condition?
• What if someone reacts negatively?
• Will I seem ‘difficult’ if I ask for what I need?

These are valid concerns. You deserve to feel comfortable and respected without pressure to overshare or mask your needs. You can build strong, respectful relationships without compromising your privacy or masking your needs.

Decide What Feels Right to Share

No rule says you have to tell colleagues about your disability. You can keep things private, share selectively, or be open from the start. What matters is what feels right to you. Some people find that being honest early helps reduce misunderstandings and invites support. Others prefer to wait until trust is built. Either way is valid.

If you do decide to share, keep it simple. For example:

• “I sometimes need a quiet space to concentrate, so I may step away when things get busy.”
• “Seeing meeting agendas in advance really helps me prepare. Could that be arranged?”

That’s enough. You don’t need to go into personal details. It’s about communicating what helps you succeed.

For more ideas, check out our guide on navigating your first day at a new job.

Ease Into Social Interactions

You don’t always have to be “on” to form meaningful connections at work. If group lunches or team banter feel overwhelming, start small. Here are gentle ways to connect:

• Join a low-pressure team coffee break or social call
• Chat one-on-one with a friendly colleague
• Send a short message to thank someone or share encouragement

These small interactions can lay the groundwork for trust and mutual respect without draining your energy.

Focus on the Practical

You don’t have to share your diagnosis to have your needs met. Frame your support requirements simply to help set boundaries and improve understanding. For example:

• “I wear noise-cancelling headphones to help me focus; just a heads-up.”
• “I sometimes need time to process before responding to questions.”
• “I prefer email over phone calls when possible. It helps me stay on top of things.”

This gives colleagues helpful insight without putting pressure on you to explain your condition. And if someone asks something you’re not ready to answer, it’s okay to say: “I’m not comfortable talking about that right now, but thank you for asking.”

Find Colleagues Who Respect You

You don’t need to build connections with everyone. Focus on the people who make you feel safe, respected, and included. Look out for those who listen without judgment, respect your boundaries and preferences, or show genuine interest without making assumptions.

Start small. Share a bit about your day or interests. Let things grow naturally. Even a small number of positive relationships can make a big difference to your work experience. And give yourself permission to step back from those who don’t respect your boundaries.

Ask for Support If You Need It

If you’re feeling isolated, unsure how to ask for adjustments, or facing challenges in your team, don’t hesitate to reach out. Support can come from:

• Your line manager or team lead
• HR or an inclusion and wellbeing officer
• A union representative (if you have one)
• A trusted colleague, mentor, or external advisor

You don’t have to manage everything alone. People and organisations like YorLinc are here to help you access the support you need to feel confident and included at work.

A Final Word

You don’t need to change who you are to fit in. Whether you’re open or private, social or more reserved, you deserve to feel comfortable, respected, and valued at work. Building relationships takes time, and doing it your way is the best way.

Your presence and perspective matter. You bring value just by being here.

Conversation Starters and Confidence Prompts

Not sure how to break the ice or start a conversation? Try these low-pressure openers:

• “Hi, I’m new here – how long have you been on the team?”
• “I saw your email earlier – thanks for the tip!”
• “This is my first time at this team meeting. Anything I should know?”
• “I usually work better in quiet spaces – any favourites around here?”
• “Would you mind emailing that to me? I find it easier to digest things in writing.”

These prompts gently ease into connection, while giving you opportunities to share your needs if you choose.